IT ALL BOILS DOWN TO ME BEING EMOS!!!

Awaken by my handphone at 8am. 2messages received. The first says, "Sorry can't meet ur in the morning. Only joining u all for dinner..." The second was the line-up for 12th main com. Someone was missing. A comrade to be missed...I had wanted to go back to sleep after the 2 messages but a lot of things was stirring up in my mind. Why is all this happening?!?!?! Eventually i fell asleep and woke up again at 10am. I'm suppose to meet some of the FOOT peeps at Kranji mrt station at 10.30am. But internally, im struggling...To go or not to go...

The turn out for the shopping trip at city square was really poor and it gave me no motivation to go though im considered half the organiser. I had set myself an aim to keep FOOT Com'07 peeps together and organise an outing/trip with full attendance but yonghan told me its almost impossible. Still i was motivated enough to say that "There's will, there's way!". How i feel like eating those words back right now. As an organiser to initiate outings, i was disheartened, to a point that i wanted to take out aim no.2 off my blog.

I still went in the end, but i was gloomy. To make things worst, there was lots of time spent waiting for each other. Of course im one of the culprits. But the uncontactable people in Msia was making me irritated. I had a hard time trying to keep the group together as not all the people can be contacted via HP. End up i spent most of the time looking for people. I dint really enjoy the shopping trip though i did buy a polo tee. Im acting more like a liason officer trying to contact people on where to meet, be it from singapore or in city square itself, which was making me kan phua dulan. Things just dont go the way i wanted. News of more absentees further dampened my spirit.

If everything was bad, the food during dinner was good. I supposed that was the only thing i enjoyed throughout the day.(seafood and beggar chicken!) After dinner, a few of us went back to singapore for we had tuition while some stay in city square to continue shopping. Talking abt tuition, i somehow dozed off a few times during lesson and was talking rubbish which me myself find it ridiculous. I was surprised i was able to last through the 2hrs teaching sub-consciously.

It was then that i realised i was really tired. What happened in the day was really minor and i made a big fuss out of it. Nobody was really at fault and it was me who let my emotion get the better of me. So i apologised here if i've made anybody unhappy. I thought what Yali said was right. Even if the turn out is poor, as long as there is someone willing to turn up, i should continue to initiate and organise! I suppose all i need now is a really good rest, to recover some of my sleep debt at least.....